Awake with Awareness

November 20, 2011

I don’t want to change the world
I want to be changed by You
The darkness in me is great
Your light exposes

When I see Your face
And I know that You see mine
Your love cuts through me
My shame and guilt are removed
I’m overwhelmed by Your love

As long as I’m in the flesh
I awake with awareness
My humanity can rule
If I allow it

I have a choice to be loved
To accept his forgiveness
To face the truth about me
The truth about God

I am changed by His story
His teachings have saved my life
I want to know Your love more
Live by Your Spirit

Looking back I see failure
My ignorance grieves my soul
To begin each day with love
Is my only hope

I will look forward
Eyes fixed on the Beloved
Hungry to know Him better
Eager to obey
The one who loves without end
My friend, my Savior, my Lord

I come this morning
Purify my heart, dear Lord
Open my eyes to see You
I cannot fathom
How near and dear Your love is 

© Terry Smith
November 4, 2011
~
~
There is a dark night
That comes to each of us
Engages the soul
 
No one likes to feel helpless
Who would dare choose the darkness
Life is on the other side
That’s what I was told
That’s what I found to be true
It is a part of the journey
 
We’re all pushed to the limit
Desperation is the word
Time to listen carefully
To heart, soul, and mind
 
I’ll choose good people
Who will give me room to think
Believe I can make it
Who have tasted the darkness
And understand the process
 
I will ask for help
From those whose lives speak to me
Who have found joy
 
© Terry S. Smith
First posted February 2, 2010
 

Entrance to my soul

November 27, 2010

~
Where can I find light
Your words become the doorway
Entrance to my soul
It gives me the understanding
Of how to live in your love
 
There is power in seeing
There is joy in the knowing
There is freedom in serving
The One who loves you
 
His promises will restore
Meditate on them daily
One is: “I’ll never leave you”
Friendship forever
 
Fresh thoughts come pouring
As I practice listening
And I am still with just one thing
Hungry to know Him
 
When afflictions come
I draw near seeking healing
The pain was worth it
I found my God was waiting
To restore and heal my soul
 
© Terry S. Smith
November 26, 2010
 
Reflections written after meditating on Psalm 119.
~

Souls refined

June 22, 2010

~
Life’s pain is like a furnace
The soul is refined by fire
Hope is born in the process
Joy is discovered
 
Those of us who know the pain
Who still live in it today
Can listen and understand
And offer new hope
 
© Terry S. Smith
Dedicated to A. Thomas
~
 

examined soul

June 9, 2010

~
Love beyond measure
Revealed in the life of a man
Needs to be examined
 
His words are flawless
They are filled with compassion
Bringing peace to the broken
Lonely and oppressed
A love that’s demonstrated
 
No one can compare
With the brilliance of his life
He knew how to think and love
The scholars marveled
The religious were tied in knots
The children ran to meet him
 
An examined soul
One that’s both loved and hated
One that seeks justice
One that seeks mercy for those
Made in the image of God
 
© Terry S. Smith
June 3, 2010
~

seeing life

March 2, 2010

~
Circumstances won’t control
Who I am, how I respond
There is a power within
The freedom to choose
~
Bitterness will rob
A person from seeing life
It is cancer of the soul
A person can heal
It takes time and good thinking
Daily looking to learn
~
Wisdom is available
Understanding is the key
More profitable than gold
Seek with all your heart
~
I began to seek
With intention at eighteen
Hungry not to repeat
The past handed down
My children would not suffer
The abandonment and loss
~
© Terry S. Smith
March 2, 2010
~

the other side of darkness

February 27, 2010

~
There is a dark night
That comes to each of us
Engages the soul
 
No one likes to feel helpless
Who would dare choose the darkness
Life is on the other side
That’s what I was told
That’s what I found to be true
It is a part of the journey
 
We’re all pushed to the limit
Desperation is the word
Time to listen carefully
To heart, soul, and mind
 
I’ll choose good people
Who will give me room to think
Believe I can make it
Who have tasted the darkness
And understand the process
 
I will ask for help
From those whose lives speak to me
Who have found joy
 
© Terry S. Smith
February 2, 2010
~

Joy is discovered

July 23, 2009

~
It has been my experience
I have heard thousands whisper
Their deepest desperate hurts
Light came in the dark
 
I met love at the bottom
This is a strange paradox
Going down led me upward
A mystery found
 
Life’s pain is like a furnace
The soul is refined by fire
Hope is born in the process
Joy is discovered
 
Why do some understand
And other’s don’t seem to see
I think I have a clue
 
Please consider this
Choose to see that you are great
A joy to behold
 
written August 29, 2008
>>

The Story

July 21, 2009

 

I look with wonder

At the story I live in

Looking back I see the pain

That I grew up in

I found a “larger story”

Of flawed and broken people

 

I found hope in their stories

I saw them living in grief

I saw their flawed lives arise

And find a deep peace

 

Is there hope for me

I said in my deep despair

I found in me a longing

To know what is true

So I studied a story

The one much larger than me

 

Focus and discipline worked

As I narrowed where I’d look

To find someone to address

Real issues of life

 

The story I discovered

Is hidden in sacred books

I found sixty-six of them

Books of the Bible

 

I just had one big question

If there is a God, “Who is he?”

I will let the writers speak

Each one their own way

They were consistent

One theme always held the sway

A persistent joy

 

One problem that I’m seeing

So many are distracted

Not looking for what is true

But trying to please

 

And when life stopped me

I decided I would look

At a story much larger

Big enough to learn

There is hope in our failure 

 

The Bible when used

By many as a “rule book”

Will wreck a man’s soul

 

I want to know the story

Told by the ones who lived it

I found a larger story 

That connects with mine

 

The connection a surprise

With integrity I searched

Looking for some good answers

I felt I could trust

  

written June 27, 2009

Inspired by article about Barbara Brown Taylor (in The Tennessean on June 27, 2009). 

Let love renew you

July 13, 2009

~
There is a rhythm of God
That runs deep from the inside
Come in and sit down with love
Let love renew you
 
The internal mystery
Must be developed by you
It’s a training you must decide
I’ve found the wellspring
 
Your vision is important
Decide where you are going
Make your plans with intention
Then be rigorous
 
My reason for discipline
Has captured my entire soul
I choose to awake with it
Deep love will rule me
 
Circumstances will not rule me
I will have no fear of death
I know what I am living for
Secure in His love
 
written October 13, 2008
~

wellspring of hope

July 2, 2009

~
I need a fresh drink
Each morning when I arise
Of eternal hope
~
In the night I am refreshed
With sleep and new beginning
There is an inner wellspring
I’ve learned to draw on
.
I find the hard work
Is to quieten my soul
And listen for truth
~
I must get outside of myself
And test the things that I hear
Be open to new learning
To challenge the fear
~
I have found a place to go
That is restful and certain
It is something I can’t give
Only point the way
.
My loving is not enough
It will fail at its best
But I will never give up
Seeking to improve
~
There is someone who loves me
I have learned “no matter what”
It’s not based on my feelings
They tend to deceive
.
When those I love are hurting
I feel helpless and so grieved
I have no way to fix it
I pray love comes soon
.
My eyes begin the searching
Looking for ways to survive
I finally found one thing
That gives me real hope.
.
written June 14, 2009
.

voice of love

June 30, 2009

~
Wisdom is supreme
Understanding is the bridge
Compassion will rule
 
Thoughtful time alone with God
To listen and to follow
You will find direction
And your soul renewed
 
Good words bring entrance
To a soul searching for life
Find words that are true
 
Which voice do you listen to
Only you can decide that
The voice of love won my life
I pray it wins yours
 
written November 4, 2008
~

a garden

June 13, 2009

~
My heart is the place
Where I work each morning
I plow, plant and sow
The seeds are chosen with care
I visualize the fruit
 
“Loneliness is a desert
Solitude is a garden”*
The mind must be cared for well
I now have a choice
 
My soul is quiet
In the stillness I listen
Waiting patiently
 
© Terry S. Smith
written February 10, 2009
 
* Henri Nouwen
~

soul’s desire

June 4, 2009

 

What matters to me
As I look back and ahead
Is to give my love
 
I have been loved well
Since I choose to search for life
Emptiness fired the kindling
Of my soul’s desire
 
Love is what I longed to know
Can love be real and lasting?
This mystery hidden well
The answer is “yes”
 
Some secrets in me
Are like fire illuminating
Certain hope and peace
A joy longing to be shared
A passion rooted in love
 
I tested this love
I began with intention
To know what is real
I listened to my questions
Out of my desperation
 
In me was a voice
I heard riveting my soul
Find out what is real
 
At sixty-six I can speak
Not just coming from a dream
But having found this great love
I long to share it
 
Joy beyond human words
Secrets longing to be told
Sacred to the soul
 
written January 14, 2009

 

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