path of hope

July 3, 2009

I see pain and rejection
I see fear and loneliness
Is there anyone hearing
These were my thoughts

I couldn’t trust the “many”
The voices who claim to know
The answers to my trouble
I began to search

Believing I could find out
Which direction I could take
To keep from repeating
What was given me
I decided honesty
With myself and those with me
Is the only way to find
A path I could trust

There’s something about
Just making a decision
Not to repeat history
This decision worked
Set me on a path of hope
Believing that I could think

It makes life interesting
When you find the fire in you
That is larger than your pain
Looking for what is real
written June 15, 2008

wellspring of hope

July 2, 2009

I need a fresh drink
Each morning when I arise
Of eternal hope
In the night I am refreshed
With sleep and new beginning
There is an inner wellspring
I’ve learned to draw on
I find the hard work
Is to quieten my soul
And listen for truth
I must get outside of myself
And test the things that I hear
Be open to new learning
To challenge the fear
I have found a place to go
That is restful and certain
It is something I can’t give
Only point the way
My loving is not enough
It will fail at its best
But I will never give up
Seeking to improve
There is someone who loves me
I have learned “no matter what”
It’s not based on my feelings
They tend to deceive
When those I love are hurting
I feel helpless and so grieved
I have no way to fix it
I pray love comes soon
My eyes begin the searching
Looking for ways to survive
I finally found one thing
That gives me real hope.
written June 14, 2009

every morning

July 1, 2009


Every morning I arise

And confront the dark places

When I focus they arrive

Challenging the Peace


I’ve found that these feelings

I awake with each morning

Were falsely handed to me

From generations


Anxiety leads the way

Based on the fears that I have

My desperation hidden

In a secret place


These feelings are masked well here

Behind my pride, lust and greed

I know these are all true

About me and maybe you


I have learned this truth

Train to daily rest

Under stress my feelings rule

I know what they are


Naming my fears has helped me

Writing them down is better

Being honest with myself

I am powerless


When I was age twelve

I had figured out my world

How to survive and succeed 

It worked for a while


Be a “good boy” all around

“Perform to please the others”

“Be strong and show no weakness”

Then things will go well


These are the lies I believed 

My feelings are based on these

The voices that are in me

Are rooted in these


They will never go away

This one thing I have learned well

They’ve created a false self

That hurts me and you


So I meet them each morning

Allow their voices to speak

I am kind and forgiving

Then put them to sleep


A twelve year old will not rule

Who I will be in this day

When the stress arrives

The voice of love will speak


written June 30, 2009