Awakening to Love

July 4, 2011

~
My soul in the dust
Your words can revive me
Teach me your ways
Create in me a hunger
To know you and follow you
 
Let me grasp your real presence
Meditate on your wonder
My grief is overwhelming
I sit in despair
 
No one seems to care
An obstacle many face
Where are my friends
Is there anyone to see
The brokenness of my soul
 
I have found there’s only one
Who sees me and knows me well
A mysterious treasure
Let your love break through
 
Your law has become my joy
It reveals deliverance
It is sweet like the honey
On the honeycomb
 
Jesus fulfilled the law
Entered the depth of my pain
Made it possible to see
The heart of my God
 
He sends the Holy Spirit
To comfort in my weakness
Give power when I’m afraid
Renew the Father’s love
 
Hold me when I cannot move
Speak for me when I cannot speak
Secure me in my deepest place
Just be still, let go
 
A decision I can make
When I sit in unbelief
I can choose to believe him
One who chose to love
 
Remember the times
Meditate on his story
Consider his love
It is personal to you
Just come to him as you are
 
I’ll run to your commands
For they have set my heart free
“I bind myself to do your will”
I will choose your love
 
© Terry S. Smith
June 28, 2011
The line in quotations is from The Abbey Psalter of Psalm 119:25-32.
Written after meditating on Psalm 119.
 

Hope

April 23, 2011

To read the true story this poem is based on click here.

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Mary and Martha

Their hope did not come

When they wanted Him to come

They were grieving and broken

 ~

Jesus disappointed them

He did not come when they called

He did come with a surprise

With power and love

 ~

He came to them right on time

To teach them new things of God

They knew He was their good friend

They knew He was God

 ~

“Your brother will rise to life”

His presence revealed this truth

He wept when He saw Mary

He knew her name well

 ~

Yes, He knows your name

He also weeps for you now

He knows your story and your grief

He is here for you

 ~

He asked for Mary

She heard Martha whispering

“The teacher is calling you”

To come and see Him

 ~

He is calling you

Do you hear His whispering

His voice can be heard

Use both heart and mind

And focus on His story

~

Dedicated to our special family friend Michelle.

First posted on my daughter Sara’s blog “A Spacious Place”.   


Fountain of Life

October 24, 2010

~
The fountain of life
Is for those who choose to hear
The One who gives life
Accept his unfailing love
Drink deeply from his presence
~
Extravagant love
Demonstrated and given
Yours to accept
~
Remember the story
Practice what he modeled here
Daily he drew near to God
And loved the wounded
Those who came to him seeking
Receiving his gentle touch
~
It is in giving
That you receive his blessing
Trusting that he has given
All his love to you
You must practice perceiving
Hearing his voice in silence
~
Renewed in mind
Accept that you are chosen
Beloved and holy
Then be clothed with compassion
Kindness and humility
~
Forgive offenses
As you have been forgiven
And above all love
It holds all things together
Let God’s peace rule your heart now
~
© Terry S. Smith
October 14, 2010
~
Written after meditating on Colossians 3, John 15, and Proverbs 14.  I am also reading Battlefield of the Mind, by Joyce Meyer. 
~ 

examined soul

June 9, 2010

~
Love beyond measure
Revealed in the life of a man
Needs to be examined
 
His words are flawless
They are filled with compassion
Bringing peace to the broken
Lonely and oppressed
A love that’s demonstrated
 
No one can compare
With the brilliance of his life
He knew how to think and love
The scholars marveled
The religious were tied in knots
The children ran to meet him
 
An examined soul
One that’s both loved and hated
One that seeks justice
One that seeks mercy for those
Made in the image of God
 
© Terry S. Smith
June 3, 2010
~

A Christmas Story

December 24, 2009

This picture and article appeared on the front page of the Burlington Daily Times on December 24, 1985, in metropolitan Boston.  My mother died in the year 2000, at the age seventy-seven connected in the heart, soul, and mind with the joy of His peace.

~

A Christmas Story

A man painfully remembers: years of confusion, guilt, and learning to survive in a world where hate and fear consumed his childhood.

When he was six years old, his mother stood on the hood of the car, kicked the windshield in and cursed the boy’s father to hell.

When the boy was eight, divorce and alcoholism robbed him of his mother.  The parent’s failure, anger, and hate tore the relationship apart and another family unit fragmented.

This is a story about a mother and son coming together after eighteen years, and about the One who stirred their hearts into a love that brought healing and hope to a once broken relationship.

~

Carol, Sid, Mama, Robert and Terry

~

I had always wondered about her.  She was beautiful, but many of my memories were painful, reinforced by my father’s hatred for her.  While I was growing up, he cut me off from anyone who cared about her.

Then during my last year of graduate school, I found where she lived, discovering that in a city of 600,000 people, I was driving past her house daily.

Should I go see her?  What would she be like now?  She would be forty-five years old.  Could I understand this woman who left four young children, never again to be involved in their childhood?

She didn’t know who I was when my wife and I knocked on her door in October of 1968.  But a new journey began.

Her story was hard.  She had married at sixteen, had three children before age twenty-one.  She married five times, was an alcoholic, and currently was living with a man who was not her husband.

She hated herself.  She had attempted suicide by cutting her throat, jumping out of a car going eighty miles an hour, and by putting a gun to her head and pulling the trigger.

But, the gun misfired.  It fell on the floor, blowing a hole in the wall.  She lived!

The reunion with her son helped her to realize she could start over again.  She began to fight!  But it was like trying to climb a greased slide.  My family — a wife and two babies — now included this woman, my mother, who, after wanting to die all these years, now had a desire to live.

The failure I experienced in my childhood caused me to pursue the field of counseling to learn how to live in relationships, and not make the same mistakes my parents made.   There had to be a way to live in this world and not be victimized by failure, anger, insecurity and guilt.

People can come back together and healing can take place in relatiionships.  But how?  How could this woman ever have forgiven herself for leaving her children?  How could the children have ever forgiven her for abandoning them?

As a family counselor in Burlington, I have chosen, for a model, one person in history who knew how to love and treat human beings.  I find very few people who have read his life.  Not many are willing to give and extend mercy toward those who hurt them.  Not many are willing to say: “I am wrong!”; “I am sorry!”; “Forgive me!”

The little baby whose birthday the world celebrates at this time of the year grew up to be a man.  He met a woman at the well who had been married five times and was living with a man not her husband.  The man at the well treated the woman with dignity, respect, consideration, and compassion.   It changed her life.

The angels announced at his birth that he has come to bring good tidings of great joy.  The woman at the well experienced it the day she met him.  I have tested it on the streets of the twentieth century and it holds today.  My mother found hope, forgiveness, and new beginnings because this man’s evaluation of human worth represented by the heart of the God and Father of us all.

Our challenge at this season is to look past the commercialism of Christmas.  To look beyond the religious ritual, and to sense the mystery of the One who came among us to demonstrate and to give a new quality of life.

I’ve just returned from a family wedding.  It was the first time in thirty-five years the family was together.  My mother flew back with us, and will celebrate her first New England Christmas with me and my family.  We realize that we owe this reunion to the One whose perspective on life continues to bring into a dark world hope and light.

Our hearts are full of thanksgiving as we celebrate the reality of his presence.

~

Light

December 17, 2009

~
Christmas season brings the lights
Lighting it up with hope, joy
Looking to give and receive
The Light of the world
 
Light within is the answer
Many walk in dark places
Confused and afraid of the night
Because they can’t see
 
There is a presence
Given to all who believe
A love without end
 
Where can I find peace?
The most important question
Asked when I was young
 
Wisdom is what I needed
Insight to find a new way
A longing for what is true
A way to find peace
 
© Terry S. Smith
December 16, 2008
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Undying passion

July 27, 2009

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God defines His love
It came through His beloved
His compassion lives
 
I know His story
I know my story of pain
His story gives life
 
He walks with kindness
He is filled with tenderness 
His name is Jesus                  
 
Jesus speaks of love
He modeled it for us all
Where else can I go?
 
He suffered for me
He also suffered for you
I can’t comprehend
 
He is in pursuit
Love always wins when you see
Undying passion
 
written Fall 2008
~