past wounds

February 20, 2010

~
Sue was my girlfriend
From the ninth grade to college
She was a princess
 
She lived in a huge mansion
Her chauffeur drove her to school
In her blue convertible
His name was “Shorty”
 
Life looked good on the outside
Sue was the oldest of five
Her father I rarely saw
Her mother stayed near
 
She was beautiful
Her world was as sad as mine
Although hers appeared the best
Money hid the tragedy
It hid all of the emptiness
Suicide was the result
 
I thought we lived in two worlds
But later I saw the truth
We came from the same sad world
Relationships dark
 
We met in our woundedness
She was very kind to me
Our hearts were breaking with grief
With no words to speak
 
At eighteen we parted ways
Trying to hang on to love
She went to the Ivy League
I went to Ole Miss
 
Our letters were sweet
Our voices became distant
We could not sustain our love
It was not enough
 
My life fell apart
Despair became a doorway
Sue’s dad died by his own hand
We were both empty
My search led me to seek life
Her search led her to despair
 
Her depression led to her death
Sadness and grief crushed us all
Money could not fix the pain
Our hearts were broken
 
Terry S. Smith
December 20, 2008
 
In memory of Sue, who died at age twenty-six.
~