Healing Process

February 26, 2015

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There is a healing process
For those aware of the wound
Who name the lie adopted
This deep soul cancer

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When a person is ready
Desperate for the healing
Then choose to fight for your life
And Renounce the lie
Revoke the insidious
Darkness with the light of life

*
The Secret hidden
To be discovered by all
Who are seeking truth
You are the “Beloved of God”
Healed and made whole by this love*

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Replace the lie that’s hidden
Believe in the love that’s given
With all your heart, soul and mind
This mysterious joy

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This revelation of love
Made clear in your own story
Remembering the times
You arose above the pain
Finding greatness in your soul

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I choose to respond
Feed the Master Truth of Love
Daily focus on this light
Move with intention
Toward this pinhole of light
This inexpressible joy
*
I know this process is true
I live it each day of life
Like a mirror I reflect
Unspeakable love
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At the heart is forgiveness
For myself and enemies
For my parents and dear friends
Who’re only human
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Yes, it is a choice
Feelings will not dominate
My heart is open
I’ll choose to respond daily
I’ll receive love and give it
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The death of these lies
Is a painful decision
The lies are so familiar
Only His love compels me
To trust love larger than me – (love demonstrated)
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This is a process of deliverance from myself. When man is at the center destruction follows. This does not need to be proven. Look at past history; look at the present; you can know the past will dictate the future unless man discovers the greatness of real love.
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That love must begin by training to love you so you will then know how to love others. Light the fire in your own soul by turning from the lies handed down to us from generations. When feelings dominate, death follows. When truth dominates freedom follows. Choose love and forgiveness and Joy follows.

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Anguish Healed

January 25, 2015

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Overwhelmed with anguish
The pain and loss is so great
Does anyone understand
The devastation

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No friends to comfort
Loses of my dear love ones
Where is God who cares
Why is this happening now
Can anyone answer me

*

The cry in the human soul
There are no easy answers
God promises to confide
In those who fear Him

*

I cannot fathom
A God who lets this happen
Suffering and grief
What is it I am missing
Do I really want to know

*

Truth hurts and it heals
The tragedy in my soul
Comes down to two things
I must face the truth about me
I must face the truth about God

*

“Fear” does not mean “Be afraid”
It means I must face greatness
Of the love of God revealed
To my shattered soul

*

The consequences
Of the choices I have made
I am destitute
The poverty in my soul
Is hidden from all to see

*

The confusion inside me
With the unanswered questions
Were cleared up when I focused
On the love of God

*

He promised to never leave
To meet me in my anguish
To forgive me of my wrongs
To renew and restore

*

I will trust in Him
Gives victory over death
Carries my burdens

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Insight only comes
After one chooses to trust
The Giver of life

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May you be blessed by the Lord
Maker of heaven and earth
One who understands your need
Gave all to forgive

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These reflections will be enhanced by reading Psalm 25, 55, 85, 115 and 145. Sarah Young, an amazing therapist and teacher, offers insight to the anguished soul in her book “Jesus Calling.” 

Relief or Healing

January 16, 2015

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Where are you God in my pain
I can’t hear you or see you
My grief and fear are mixed
I’m broken inside

*

Who will come and help
I cry in desperation
Can you hear me, God
The silence is deafening
In unbelief and belief

*

You said for me to “Be Still”
And know that you are God
My anxiety blinds me
My fear imprisons

*

I need you to come
Keep your promises you gave
I am overwhelmed
There is no one to comfort
My body and soul feel dead

*

I need a resurrection
You understand all my grief
You meet me with compassion
I will wait for you

*

You always come at right times
My soul is refined by fire
False thinking I’ve depended on
No longer secures

*

I stand waiting for relief
Your comfort is far away
That is the way I’m feeling
I find no relief

*

“I have come to heal
To bring hope to the hopeless
Freedom for the prisoners
Give sight to the blind
Bring good news to the poorest
Give all the captives freedom”

*

Healing instead of relief
Is the promise He’s given
With mixed feelings do we hear
Choose who we will trust

*

Reading Psalm 16 and 46 reveal a narrow path of hope. We all find ourselves at some time in the spot these reflections communicate. When I decided that I did not want relief but I wanted healing above all, a pinhole of light entered my world. I chose to move toward that light with trust and hope to make it through the storm I was in at the time. We all think no one understands. That is a lie. There is One who does and comes to bring that healing that only He can give. I choose to “Be still” trusting His words today. 

Early Morning Times

January 4, 2015

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My best questions come
In the early morning times
In quiet moments
I’m confronted with my life
My fears and anxieties

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I’m frightened sometimes by dreams
By realities of life
For others and for myself
My questions are hard

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What do I believe
I struggle with unbelief
About the world and the pain
How do I view me
And the big question is God
And the meaning of friendship

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I take the time to be still
To listen and contemplate
The puzzle of this journey
That involves my life

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In my early life
I learned to detach myself
To not feel the pain
My imagination flew
To a place where I felt safe

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I could settle down
With memories that were good
Of people who cared
Grandmothers and the neighbors
There was a secret comfort

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I found in the solitude
A forced abandonment pain
A feeling of helplessness
With no person there

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Solitary confinement
On the raft of shifting seas
With sharks all around
I was searching for answers
To understand and survive

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It was in this search
To find out who I can trust
I found a focus
Big enough to contain me
Give me perspective on my life

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No easy answers
But confidence I could find
The hidden love presented
By One I could trust
Who never failed to give love
To broken and lost children

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I am one of His
If I ask the question,”Why?”
I must ask then “Why not me?”
We all have a cross
His mysterious presence came
“Don’t be afraid, I’m with you”

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Reflections after reading Psalm 4, 34 and 64. Proverbs 4:7. I had no mother or father to guide my thinking or big enough to listen to the pain. I had no words to communicate. There was only silence and a simple prayer taught me. “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray thee, Lord, my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray thee, Lord, my soul to take.” There was a song I learned that I sang, “Jesus Loves Me” this I know. I chose as a child to hold onto this mysterious unseen love and to trust this unseen God. I grew up and learned his story and discovered there was One who was with me when I was unaware and the angels were attending. His love was there and looking back I can see. He brought me through it all with His angels attending. He will bring you through. In the midst of my unbelief I cry out confessing it and pray “Help my unbelief!

Friends in Flight

July 4, 2013

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We are friends in flight

We’ll follow the lead pilot

Our gaze riveted

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Our mission is clear

Being empowered by love

Filled with compassion

Flying in tight formation

We enter with confidence

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With the speed of light

We penetrate the darkness

With hope and real joy

In the midst of suffering

We break the pain barrier

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Our Lead models how

He shows us how to be real

This kingdom treasure

Has awakened me to joy

I choose to sell all to find

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Courage needed now

In radical discipline

Encouraged by this love

To move with real faith

Beside wisdom in the darkness

Showing trust in his Presence

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Freedom for the prisoners

Sight for those who are blinded

Good news for those who are poor

Release the oppressed

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He will lead us in

To accomplish His mission

Light penetrating darkness

Healing the soul inside out

Available to all who come

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This writing is dedicated to Larry Malone, retired Navy Captain who flew a A-6 Intruder off the USS Enterprise during the Viet Nam War.  Larry models for me the healing process of a deep soul wound.  He along with many gave himself to war for our country.  He came out with a deep soul wound as result of the “death transactions” he was called to participate in as a young man.  They equipped him to fight but he was not equipped to deal with the internal wound that he came out with.  His story tells the healing process through the years.  

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He is now a “friend in flight.” We fly as wingmen to the Jesus our lead pilot.  On this day when people of this nation celebrate the freedom, I honor Larry and so many who gave their lives courageously.  Larry returned to fight a different war, a war of the soul.  He now is fighting for the young men and women who experienced this deep “soul wound” he understands.  

 

Thank you, Larry, my friend in flight.

~

My friend Genma also highlighted Larry on her blog and radio show:

http://genmaspeaks.blogspot.com/2013/07/vietnam-navy-pilot-larry-malone-on.html 

The Big Question

July 3, 2013

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Two things offend God for sure

When we judge one another

And indulge in self hatred

Who gave us this charge

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The higher love comes

Magnificent promises

For those who listen

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Getting past yourself

Arising to behold God’s love

He knows your story

Decision each one can make

A painful but joyful choice

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Thinking clearly brings power

It cuts through the distractions

Awakens a whole new world

From the inside out

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Transformation can take place

Energy is ignited

When I decide to give thought

And take the action

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Distractions follow feelings

Feelings are ruled by the mind

Winds of desire can destroy

Or they can give life

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So the big question

Is what do I really want

The answer shapes the vision

Then the questions form

I follow seeking knowledge

Being shaped by the answers

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Respect for myself

And for all those around me

Even enemies

Leads me to reconsider

And think about what matters

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I will decide that

Not a generational

Relational lie

That will revolve around me

But revolves around life

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Thank you, Sarah Young, author of Jesus Calling, for your thoughtful comments on the following passages.Luke 6:37; 2 Timothy4:8; Titus 3:4,5; Romans 8:1

http://www.coachinglifematters.org

The Soul Wound

June 28, 2013

No one knows the pain
Of the soul wound of others
But I can listen
 
I will not give up
Seeking to participate
In loving others
 
Only two commands matter
Loving God is the first one
Loving each other is next
Give me a pure heart

The deepest soul wound
Unspeakable tragedy
Is understood by your God
He shares the same wound

Betrayed by his friends
Who thought they knew who they were
Jealousy and strife
They were awakened by love
Friendship indescribable

This story I tell
After listening to the wound
The soul wound fully expressed
Given space to heal
In the safety of true friends
Peace passes understanding

A pinhole of light

June 16, 2013

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A “pinhole of light”
Comes in the deepest darkness
Hope found me waiting

There’s a room of loss
In the heart of everyone
I go to the pain

Death cannot hold me
I am not afraid to live
A gift I receive

Joy is to my soul
What blood is to my body
This belief I hold

A certain unseen
Available to each one
Unspeakable love

Everyone has an amazing story. I believe each person is being pursued by inexpressible love. Make time to reflect. I am indebted beyond words to so many who have made that love real to me by the way they live. These things, along with my personal story, are discussed in my book “Delta Blues – Darkness to Life”.  It will be available in the fall. The introduction to my book is on my new web site:
http://www.coachinglifematters.org/delta-blues.html


Thank you, Landon Saunders for this deep true heart felt line I heard you speak 16 years ago: “Joy is to your soul what blood is to your body.” Thank you, Paul, for what you said from prison about not fixing our eyes on what is seen and but on what is unseen because what is seen is temporary and what is unseen is eternal. Thank you, Sarah Young for sharing your interpretation of Jesus’ invitation,”When you approach me in stillness and trust, you are strengthened.” Thank you Rebecca Greer for your words, “pinhole of light.” Your story inspires me beyond words.

Joy is my lived experience!

Joy and Pain

May 3, 2013

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This is a mixture
They seem to go together
A choice can be made
Joy and pain are “twin sisters”*
A surprised discovery
 
I began this life with joy
The pain was hidden from me
Then surprised me with vengeance
And joy sustained me
 
A well-spring of energy
Like living water it came
It found me in the despair
Offering me hope
 
The memory compelled me
I am larger than my pain
I discovered this secret 
Made in God’s image
 
This huge discovery came 
A love affair ignited
One that cannot be explained
Pursued by God’s love
 
There is great wisdom
Pay attention to questions
Reflect on your life
Give yourself to the seeking
God is searching to find you
 
He is running to meet you
With the deepest compassion
You find it in the story
Of God’s unique Son
 
 

“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in our hearts through faith.  And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.”  Ephesians 3:16-17

 

“You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”  Psalm 16:11

 

*I got the phrase “Twin Sisters” from a poem my wife Charlotte wrote years ago. 

 

For my nephew Kirk, on his birthday

Soul Refined by Fire

July 28, 2012

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I met love at the bottom
This is a strange paradox
Going down led me upward
A mystery found
 
Life’s pain is like a furnace
The soul is refined by fire
Hope is born in the process
Joy is discovered
 
Why do some understand
And others don’t seem to see
I think I have a clue
 
Please consider this
Choose to see that you are great
A joy to behold
 
first posted July 23, 2009

The Language of Tears

June 17, 2012

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The voices that I hear

Are the ones who are not speaking

Their silence is screaming out

I do know their pain

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Suffering is the teacher

It is one I did not choose

Desperation silenced me

I now have language

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All along the way

People have arisen here

I did not know I needed

Their voices touched me

Their presence ignited me

A fire lit up my soul

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Friendship sets me free

To listen to the heartbreak

And wait in silence

Compassion invites me in

Only my tears tell my heart

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It is the language of tears

It is my deepest desire

To make real what is the truth

Extravagant love

~

Dedicated to Julie

~

 
 
 
This past Friday, I had the sad honor of speaking at the funeral of young Ty Osman. 
 
Four questions I addressed:
 
1. What would Ty want you to know?
“I never tasted death.  I moved from life to life.”

2. What would Ty want you to do?
“Remain aware that what matters most is a person.”
 
3. What would Ty want you to feel?
“Feel and believe that God passionately loves you.”
 
4. Who would Ty want you to be?
“Be someone who practices being in the presence of God.”
 
These are four moments that I shared in connection with each question:
 
1. The moment Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead (John 11).
 
2. The moment Jesus revealed he was aware of the sick woman (Mark 5).
 
3. The moment Jesus compassionately said to Jairus, “Don’t be afraid, only believe!” (Mark 5:36)
 
4. The moment I sat with Ty at midnight and I listened to him share  his heart (July 13, 2011).  I told Ty that if I had five minutes to live, and could only tell him one thing, it would be this:  “Go into your room and close your door and pray to your Father, who is unseen …  Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”  — Jesus  (Matthew 6:6-8)
 

Here are three things Ty focused on each day:
 
 Kneeling to pray.
Reading the devotional book the Jesus Calling.
Listening to God by reading the Bible.
 
You are invited to develop these spiritual habits in your life. Many people have been inspired by Ty’s life and faith and are now adding Ty’s routine to their day. 
 
Ty Osman II leaves us a legacy of joy that he is living right now.
 
~
Our hearts are broken
Ty Osman our beloved
Has gone – left a gaping hole
Our grief overwhelms
How can you heal the pieces
Of our souls that are shattered

We don’t understand
Why his life was taken now
We are angry, sad and torn
Who gets the blame here
We thought you would protect him
Where were your angels this time

I did protect him
I gave him what he wanted
A life eternal
His purpose fulfilled
He has made my presence known

I knew him better than you
I loved him more than you did
I made him in my image
Just like I made you

I never promised
That  you would not see trouble
What I promised you is this
I’ll never leave you
Death cannot destroy your life
You believe in me, you will not die

He heard my calling
He listened to me as a son
Ty spent time with me

We would daily meet
He struggled with perfection
He thought he must be good
For me to call him my son
I met him in his weakness

He chose to believe what mattered most.

The memories that we have
Treasures that last forever
Living with moments of joy
The look in his eyes
 
The joy that he shared
With passion to serve others
A young life that saw
The vision of love for all
Compelled by friendship with God
~
 
                                      Ty Osman
 

Just as He hears You

January 14, 2012

A woman who had spent all of her money on doctors, after being ill for twelve years, touches Jesus cloak.  A miracle happened as she cried out and reach out to Jesus.  The same happens today.  He hears us and always responds. God hears the human cries.  Click here to read the story.

A large crowd came to see him

He stood there on the sea shore

Jairus fell at his feet

“My daughter is dying”


“Will you come and heal?

She is only twelve years old”

He begged Jesus to come

“If you will put your hands on her

I know she will not die”


He left with the crowd

Traveling toward Jairus’ House

In the crowd was a woman

An outcast by law


Bleeding for twelve years

Unclean by purity laws

She suffered greatly

All of her money was gone

She touched the hem of his cloak


She touched his cloak and was healed

She could feel that she was clean

Whole from touching his garment

He could feel her touch


Jesus felt the power leave

His response was, “Who touched me?”

Everyone was silent

All were touching him


Then the silence was broken

This woman came forth and spoke

His gaze fell on the woman

She dropped to her knees


Shaking, fearful and amazed

“I am the one who touched you”

He listened to her story

He heard why she came


“Because you believe, you’re healed”

Go in peace now and stay well

He heard the cry of her heart

Just as he hears yours 

 
© Terry S. Smith
January 1, 2012
Dedicated to my Sara
 

Mark Your Life

December 18, 2011

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Mark your life with joy
Mark your life with vision
Mark your life with love
 
Mark your destiny with hope
Defeat the past with courage
Trouble is reality
Joy the antidote
 
I need a fresh wind
Rekindle the fire in me
Set my heart aflame
 
I will command joy
I have learned to use my mind
I will decide what I think
About life and death
Despair, guilt, shame, fear are gone
When I set head, heart, and gut
 
Who decides your destiny
Who will decide your future
Who speaks to the real issue
We all want to know
 
“Religion” fails us
Humans construct it with care
Why does it bring death
The human heart feels judgment
Forgiveness not practiced
 
Acceptance and love
The keys to relationship
Given free to all
Who seek to know what is true
Who seek to know what matters
 
I’m being transformed
My joy is larger than pain
Our lives are sacred
A treasure to be shared
The journey grows richer with time
 
I cannot explain
The joy I live with each day
Eternal friendship
 
Wisdom can be found
Mark your story with knowledge
What’s appropriate
And how to treat a person
Made in the image of God
 
“My hands off – heart in”
That means I’m not in control
I will do what I can do
Leave the rest to God
Seek wisdom with all my heart
And wait for the clarity
 
I am just a man
Ordinary one at that
Aware of my own greatness
Just because I am
With all my failures and sins
I discovered I am loved
 
So I will show up
I will mark my life with Peace
Like leaven that makes bread rise
A sweet aroma of joy
Will fill up my soul
 
© Terry S. Smith
December 17, 2011
 
“I came to give life and to give it abundantly.” Jesus
“Never, never, never give up!” Winston Churchill 
“Nothing in the World is as Important as a Human Being.” Landon Saunders
 
With thanks to Natalie Allan for sharing, “My hands off – heart in.”
~